Feed the world on hipster comics singing “Do They Know It’s Christmas.”

“…physics shows that women have a lower center of gravity than men, making them more suited to carrying groceries and laundry baskets;”

That’s just one of the points of the 2nd place winning Middle School level Creation Science Fair project, “Women Were Designed For Homemaking.” This whole article is something straight out of The Onion, but it’s all real. I implore you to read all the entries, including honorable mentions, like “Rocks Can’t Evolve, Where Did They Come From Mr. Darwin?”

The gift ideas are starting to come fast and furious, from the Garden Jawa to the truly sublime Crochet Birthdoll. In these tight economic times, tough decisions will need to be made.

I can’t tell if I know this woman personally, but I can’t help but think the world is a little poorer for having not lost her.

Milk Men – A Mad Men Parody

As my last girlfriend explained, I’m not the kind of person a woman wants to spend her life with, so I don’t really have to worry about this sort of thing. But sadly, there are men out there with women calling 911 because they won’t marry them. Cads.

Get on the wait list for your very own Tauntaun sleeping bag. Behind me, of course.

Great little video about soda pop shop and the guy who’s livin’ the dream.

being so hot.

And to make it a Weezer twofer, check them out playing with Kenny G.

From the makers of the Fleshlight (who’ll you’ll remember from last week brought us the Vampire-themed apple pie in a can) comes this fantastic invention, which appears to be a device for two guys to practice double teaming a girl when no girl is available.

I’m quitting my job to sell these door-to-door at fraternities.

DeKalb man wins injury lawsuit. That’s all.

Yeah, puns are awesome. So is the idea of tying your client’s logo to a dead fly on the ground.